Building Boys

In addition to chore training and our read aloud routine, I try to have an engaging activity for my preschoolers everyday. At this age, they seem to enjoy repeating the same activity each day for a week adding variations and new twists to it as we go along.

My just-turned-3-years-old really enjoyed this weeks activity so I thought I would share:


I found a scrap piece of soft pine wood and some small penny nails. I got about 6 nails started into the wood then taught him how to hold the hammer, which was a little too heavy for him, to finish driving the nails into the wood. It took some encouragement at first as he had a few misses then wanted to give up. Hoping to build a little character, I encouraged him to keep trying. By the end of our session this skill was still difficult for him, but he had some success, so I had something to build on the next day.

Each day he practiced hammering the nails and each day it became easier for him. By Thursday he could nail them in quite easily.

On the second day, after his nailing practice, we decided to cut electrical tape and put it on his board. He cut the tape himself, and was quickly bored of it. :)

However, he loved to measure the board with the measuring tape. I placed the tape on the board and counted inches as I pointed to each number. I showed him how to hook the end of the tape measure onto the end of the board. I took a marker and drew the inch marks onto the board. Again, I named the numbers as I wrote them above the inch marks.

We played a game with the numbers. I named a number and he pointed to the one I named. When he pointed to the right number I gave him a tickle. He almost always got them right so he got lots of tickles.

On the last day we did this activity, after he drove a few nails "just like Daddy", I showed him how to connect the nails with lines. He used a marker and connected the nail heads like connect-the-dots. Finally, he personalized the board by drawing what we are calling "fire crackers". ;)

Learning how to use a hammer gave him a real sense of accomplishment and a confidence that he is making progress toward becoming a man like his Dad. He really admires his Dad and has a natural desire to work at his side. I will cherish these times I have with him.

The Joy of The Boy

I want to share a testimony of how God has used our little boy to do great things in our family. As always, I cast no judgment on the practices of others, but I do not wish to be silent about how God is working in our lives.

Today is our little boy's 3rd birthday. Aaron is our 3rd of 4 children and he is the only boy.

He is such a joy to have in our home. His energy, activity, humor, emotions, silly antics and manly nature keep the ladies in our family entertained. How we love our little boy, yet...

his Dad and I cannot celebrate his life without an underlying feeling of remorse and sorrow.

This boy is a mercy child. He is our first child born after a vasectomy reversal. We almost rejected him as we had for many years been rejecting the potential for other children in our family. When we gaze upon this boyish blessing we come face to face with the fact that we almost prevented his life and we even had to be convinced by the Holy Spirit through His Word to accept him. If left to our own plans to do what merely seemed right in our own eyes, we would have closed the door on him not accepting him into our family. This is a humbling reality.

This is the reality that leaves a bittersweet mixture of joy and regret in our hearts.

How merciful God has been to us to open our blind eyes to His Truth, His Design, His Will, His Enlightenment, His Provision?!?!



Not only do we celebrate Aaron's life today, but also, how God has used him to lift us out of the worldly rut of rejecting life and into a challenging, yet deeply rewarding place where all of His blessings will be received into our home from now on despite the cost. We will continue to give God ALL the credit for every child He delivers to us because He alone is the giver of life, not us. We destroy, prevent and waist life, but God is so merciful to send His Son to give us a new heart and to show us His Ways that lift us out of our evil destruction.



Aaron is more than just a birthday boy. He is a testament to how God is working in our household!!

Emergency!! MY Baby Has A Zipper on the Back of Her Dress

Took my 8 month old to the doctor with minor symptoms that she might have swallowed something.

See anything unusual in the throat area on her x-ray?? Yes, that would be a strange metal object!!!

Needless to say, we rushed to Children's and the diagnosis?? Victoria has a zipper ON THE BACK OF HER DRESS!!!

What an emotional roller coaster!!!! Thanking God that she is fine!!

Dominion Over Fear of Pain during Childbirth

The Final Push

Before I had my first child, I had an intuition that God uses the process of childbirth to teach and mold us as women, if we make ourselves teachable and we approach it naturally, according to His design. I have proven myself to be a very slow learner as it has taken FOUR children to fully submit myself to God's will. I have, however, learned a few things about His plan for childbirth and hope to share them in this blog.

A brief history:

Baby 1 was what I call The Works. Like if you go to a car wash a get the Super Max wash. I just laid there while technology ran the show. I was induced 3 weeks early for convenience. I never felt a painful contraction because the epidural was administered and the whole birth was managed. I dilated 1 centimeter per hour on the dot. She was healthy, but small. And my need for a God's provision was completely numbed.

Sensing that something was not right, I wised up with baby 2. I educated myself about the risks of inducing childbirth. I read Dr. Sear's The Birthing Book and Natural Birth The Bradley Way. I was amazed by the complications caused by opting for the easy route. But, with Baby 2, God broke me by teaching me that intentions to go natural alone do not make for a safe birth. Either way, natural or The Works, He would be in control of my labor. Her birth was complicated by an abrupted placenta at 32 weeks. Several ambulance rides to the hospital, strict bed rest and finally an emergency c-section would be the method of her delivery. She was four weeks early, but very healthy. Praise God for the technology WHEN it is needed!!

With baby 3, I worked hard for nine months trying to deal with tensions and fears. During this pregnancy, I read some great books about natural childbirth. One was Ina Mays Guide to Childbirth. In that book, Ina May gave me a vision for the possibilities of a tear-free, complication-free birth. Also, Spiritual Childbirth, which laid out the possibility for a natural pain-free birth by trusting in Christ who has liberated us from the curse. I knew that to have a natural birth with minimal pain I would have to deal with some minor conflicts in my marriage partnership. Dealing with these conflicts would allow hubby and I to be a stronger team as we brought this baby into the world and this would effect my ability to cope with this birth. Unfortunately, I spent the entire pregnancy avoiding these issues hoping that they would miraculously vanish. As expected, my tension, though minor, did affect my ability to cope. I opted for pain relief just as I was entering transition, the hardest but shortest part of labor.
If I would have persevered just a little longer... I was quite disappoint. God was still teaching through it all, revealing and purging disconnections between my relationship with Him, as well as, with my husband.

I was given another chance with baby number 4. Hubby and I worked to make our little birthing team stronger and I spent 9 months (a blessing to have so much time) practicing putting my faith in God. During my toddler's naps I would lay down and practice tensing then relaxing each part of my body. I would pray for God's strength and protection admitting to Him that I could not do this on my own apart from His Grace. I also, peered through pages of the Bible searching for verses to memorize and recite throughout the expectancy and labor. Among them:

¹ I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. ² And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. ~Romans 12:1,2

Each pregnancy has brought me closer to Him is some way, but I feel I am finally getting off of the milk and learning to walk on water with Him on a more regular basis. If I had taken all of the c-section and induction opportunities presented to me along the way, I would have avoided important exercises for spiritual growth. Trust me, it wasn't always easy. I was tempted on many occasions to go for the epidural. As my due date approached, I would plead with God like a baby, asking Him to procrastinate this birth. "Please, Lord, not tonight. I am too tired. I have a sinus cold. I just want to sleep well tonight." I am sure you can get the picture that I am not a perfectly obedient person, but maybe that will improve by facing trials and life's situations head on... I hope????

3 days after my due date I was awakened by gentle but very real and regular contractions. They were 6 minutes apart, but I knew from the sign posts that birth was not close. It was 2 am in the morning when they started, so I tried to settle back to sleep even though I was a little excited. I knew this was it. At 4ish, with a whisper I shared with Vince that it was time. I snuggled with him and for a cycle of every 5 or 6 minutes of rest between contractions I would go into a deep sleep. I felt like I had been asleep for hours, but the clock told me different. This went on all night. As I was aroused by each contraction, I would praise God that He was showing me how only He can give me true rest. He would never give me more that I can handle. He is so good!!

Around 7 am we got up. We shared the news with our children. I ate a nourishing breakfast and drank alot of my special tea brew. I relaxed on the couch, still having contractions and stopping to focus on each one, asking each member of by body to relax and submit itself to my Creator. Our house was marked by peace and joy on the morning of Nov. 20th. Conversation was mostly about what we would name her. We really had no ideas.

Around 11:00 I started moving around more and the labor got moving a little faster. I got back to the couch so I could stay focused and regain dominion over any tension that might try to sneak into my muscles. Contractions were suddenly very close together and strong. I told Hubs I thought it was time to get going to the hospital. The ride was the hardest. It is never easy to relax in a car on the interstate especially when you are in transition, the hardest part of labor. The trip in the car was the only time I experienced real out-of-control pain radiating in my back. I thrashed about in the back seats of our minivan trying to get comfortable. During contractions, I hung like a monkey on the handle that is on the ceiling of our van being quite thankful for our heavily tented windows. Between contractions, I sat on my knees backwards in the back bucket seat hugging the head rest. I was behaving in a very undignified manner- I was loosing it and prayed that we would get there soon so I could relax again.

A Little Rest

Upon arriving, the first person we saw was my doula. Her godly presence immediately strengthened and subdued me. During these moments it is so important to limit ungodly and unlikeminded people who cause stress and frustration. You need to surround yourself with people like Christy. Her life beams of focused fortitude and valor in a feminine sort of way. She and Vince helped me out of the back of the van where I realized that I couldn't walk. The contractions were back to back. As I was being wheeled into the hospital I kept my head down and my eyes closed and thought of nothing but the task at hand, and the importance of guarding against stress and tension. I must depend on God especially in the hard times as He alone has the power to sooth and calm me, and He did.

Sensitive content follows:

A funny- I had an extraordinarily strong desire to lean against the nurses' station and push out the baby, but I didn't. Some how I suppressed that urge as....

I entered my room and darted toward the bathroom. I wasn't in pain, but I felt an intense urge to use the bathroom. I kept telling Christy and Vince that if I could go to the bathroom I would feel better. Well, after being in there for quite a while having what I was thinking must be THE BOWEL MOVEMENT of the century. As it turned out, I was a little confused by my body's signals and finally realized that I was actually pushing the baby down. Oops!! I can see why babies are frequently born in the toilet. I finally came out of the bathroom. It was uncomfortable to lay on my back in the bed. It felt like I was laying on a baby. St. Vincent's beds are equipped to accept a bar, and the nurse suggested she put the bar on my bed. I liked the idea, so basically, I hung from a bar like a monkey for the next 30 minutes or so while I pushed my baby out. I only pushed when I felt the urge, no nurses shouting at me to push. The original plan was for Christy to coach my pushing stage. I would have complied, but I couldn't hear anything over my body urges speaking very loudly demanding my allegiance. I wanted to say, "Speak up, Christy. I can't hear you over my uterus". :)


One time, I got a significantly longer break before the next pushing contraction. Time seemed to pause and everyone seemed to disappear. It was just me and God and He was again showing me that He knows my needs and gives me breaks when I need them most. At this point the head was crowning. I did feel some burning, but it didn't hurt- it was just a feeling. I can see how many would react to the burning as if it were pain. After all, for years we have referred to it as the ring of fire. Sounds dramatic and painful. If you stop, relax and put it in perspective you might decide it is only a feeling. As the next pushing urge came, it was powerful, again NOT PAINFUL, just powerful. I released the bar and grabbed onto Vince's neck. He held me strong as I pushed maybe two more times to deliver our baby. The sun was shining brightly in my room and our baby was delivered into an atmosphere of peace and joy rather than pain and distress. She looked big and healthy to me and I put her skin to skin and nursed her immediately to regulate her temperature.Gazing upon our New Creature

Christy Jenkins, A Wise and Intuitive Doula

Vince said that we would name her Victoria Grace because God had given me grace through this victorious delivery. Jesus was victorious over fear and pain in my life and drew us both into a closer relationship with God throughout the experience.

Victoria Grace Smith
11/20/2009
7 pounds 12 ounces
20 inches long

Sister Love

They who love us till we die,
Who in sorrow have been tried,
Who will watch our closing eye,
When all grows cold beside:
Where shall friends like these be found,
Search the earth and ocean wide;
On what hallowed spot of ground,
Save our own fireside?

~Anne Pratt

One of the benefits that sprang from our isolation on the mission field many years ago was the intense bonding our immediate family enjoyed. On mission, we had no like-minded friends outside of our family. For the first few months, I pitied myself about this. I whined that the girls had no friends, and they were lonely. Well, that was not the truth as the Lord eventually revealed to me.



In a very short time, I began to notice our daughters were NEVER bickering with one another, and it seemed that any unpleasant form of sibling rivalry had dissipated entirely. In fact, the days in our home in the woods, far from society were the setting in which our girls had delightful fun together as sisters. As the Lord would have it, He used this isolation to wean us from unhealthy peer-dependent relationships while growing our relationships with one another on a deeper plane. Even my hubby and I began to depend on and support one another in ways that we had never done before. What a blessing this isolation was for our family. Oh, we spent alot of time with other people on the mission field, but they were the sorts of people, though very sweet, with which we could not share Christian fellowship because of unequal yokement.




Now that we are back there are many friends that come knocking wanting to play. I can tell when there has been too much "socialization" when my children begin to sneer at one another. That is when we scale our social lives back again.

I am certainly not saying that I think it unhealthy to have friends. Friends are a good thing. Rather, I am saying that a ration should be applied here. In our society, we tend to tip the balance too far in one direction. In reaction to some strange fear that we will not be "socialized" enough, we find ourselves saturated with peer-dependent symptoms that reveal themselves heavily in our marriages and sibling relationships. And, on top of it all, we have decided that these unresolved problems or the norm, a standard environment for human development.

Let me just say, Christian, that unresolved problems within your family should NOT be your norm.




If you are having issues in your marriages and with your children, I want to encourage you to take time to isolate and simplify your contacts outside of your immediate families while you make attempts to find resolutions to your conflicts. Get control over your social life, and keep it at moderation levels. We find that we have good control over peer-dependency by homeschooling.

If you are suffering from bitter relationships in your family, than you have no business enjoying great fun with people outside of your family while within, there are sisters and brothers, husbands or wives suffering for love and support. That is cheating anyway. Your outside friends don't see you often enough-- when you are tired or sick or relaxed in your sin nature. It is too easy to be loving and loved during our best moments which we reserve for public display, but God has called us to a deeper love and compassion for one another and we should not avoid these training grounds designed for practicing deeper compassion within our own homes.

Spring Break?!?

I need to take a minute to share a secret that I wish others knew. I am not trying to brag, but rather expose something that too few of us know.

My kids do not want to take a Spring Break. It is true! We talked about it and they both said they want to press forward with math and they would read and play their instruments anyway. Though they did not mention it, I think they feel very secure in their daily routine which is another reason they do not want to break it. They are with us all of time, so if the purpose of the break is to spend time as family, well... it is a non-issue here and we should not think that acceptable. Family is the backbone of Christ's ministry and if you have to take time off of what you regularly do to have time for Christ's ministry something is not right. Yes, my husband is away when he is a work, but he is working on behalf of the family and the children and I are here at home working on behalf of the family. EVERYTHING we do is a family operation centered around our home.

They love to learn and do not feel it a worthwhile day unless they are engaged with science, literature, expression through writing, music and so on. Reading, writing and ciphering are play tools that help us enjoy a playground of adventure that the Lord has given us.

If they were in a school situation, I would guess that this would not be so. They WOULD desire a break from the hoopla of what is called "education", that is not any such thing. Real education springs from a true joy of learning. It does not require rewards, bribes or recognition. The reward is the joy that comes from new understanding of the world God has given us, and it is enough to entice us further.

I am so thankful that our children experience true pleasure from being educated. Learning has become our lifestyle, it is who we are. We are learners. Just as we are Christians or we are women. We do not take a break from being Christians do we? or from being women? I should hope not!!!Why would they want to take a break from something that builds them and make them feel deeply satisfied and now is who the are... true learners.

Again ya'll (southern girl talk to emphasize I am serious), my husband and I are not college graduates and we did not enjoy school, yet through our adventure of relaxed homeschooling, though we despise school, we have learned to love learning. Our children are thriving well beyond us. They have out learned us by miles with no end in sight.

If you are reading this, you really need to consider this option for your family.

The Project are Coming!!

What is that I hear?...
The sound of school books slamming shut, the children are scurrying about gathering their projects while chanting "Do hard things, do hard things!"

STOP!!!!!

A side explanation for school parents: I am not dreaming this stuff up. This did happen in our home today, and similar events happen frequently in the homes of home-educated families across the nation. You need to know this!

Okay back to my story...

I AM very happy to hear this type of chanting, but I'll have to admit it makes me feel panicky inside because it means the projects are coming out of their closets and drawers. This is scary to a momma who likes to be neat and organized.

With all of this creative ingenuity brewing and stewing around here, mostly in the form of child-led PROJECTS, comes a need for table space.

Being the aesthetically sensitive and dreadfully frugal person that I am, thrift store stalking has been my main strategy for finding attractive and affordable tables to fill the bill. Months have passed by and I have not found what is needed. Plan B--which should have been Plan A--was to look around in our garage for ideas. Here is what we came up with:

This is a plastic foldaway table that my sister-in-law gave me. It is 48X24, the perfect size for this corner in my kitchen. A great spot for Alexey to decorate cakes or for other cooking projects. I plan to make a skirt it soon, and should transform to look something like this:

This is another 48X24 plastic table. I really like this size. I made a table skirt equipped with velcro so that it is detachable. I LOVE that it hides a wash tin which I use to give Aaron baths so the kitchen looks less cluttered. He likes to get under it and play, so it entertains him while I do kitchen work. I use this table to keep produce and homemade baked good out for the kids to snack on. It is also a great spot for my picnic basket filled with cloth napkins and bibs. A real multi-tasker! Cute, too!

This is in our library, and it is where the girls do a good deal of their school work. Looks like Catherine is putting a model covered wagon together. Here I took a large plastic folding table and covered it with some of our maps. I then covered it with a clear shower curtain and voila. They are learning more geography than ever, too. Oh, look... Catherine's glue stick is staking its claim in Oklahoma.

I threw this photo in for kicks. This little fellow loves when the girls rock him in this cradle even though he is too big for it.

Who is the first and best of beings?

This is the first question we are answering in our catechism. Before I read the answer, I like to try to answer it, testing myself on how well I know the doctrine of the Scriptures. This one is easy.

Answer: God is the first and best of beings.

Scripture proofs: Isaiah 44:6; Psalm 8:1; 96:4; 97:9, 1 Samuel 2:2

Teach these to your children. These Scriptures are powerful. Knowing exactly who God is can give children a great sense of peace, and bring this into a state of praise and awe for over their Creator. Children praising the Lord gives Satan a first class beating!

I am Catechizing My Children

Well... Catechizing is a practice that has been familiar to those of the past, but it is not so common these days, at least not that I am aware of. In History's past, children studies catechisms so that they may accurately know the the doctrine of the Scriptures, and avoid deception. Now, I suppose that programs like Awanas are a lighthearted form of catechizing. But, may I dare to point out that these popular church programs are elementary compared to what our ancestors learned and understood.

What is it?
Catechize comes from the Greek word katecheo which is translated "to indoctrinate" or " inform, instruct, teach".

It is used here: Luke 1:4 "That thou mightest know the certainty of those things, wherein thou hast been instructed."

And here: Acts 18:25 "This man was instructed in the way of the Lord; and being fervent in the spirit, he spake and taught diligently the things of the Lord, knowing only the baptism of John."

A catechism is a list of questions, their answers and their scripture proofs in a logical order for memorization. We are using a Baptist Catechism that is patterned after the reformed Westminster Catechism. Here is the link: http://www.desiringgod.org/AboutUs/OurDistinctives/ABaptistCatechism/

This is a picture of Prudence catechizing Christiana's children
in John Bunyan's Christiana, Part II of Pilgrim's Progress.

I am interested to know if others are catechizing their children or themselves. If so, which one are you using and why? Please comment.

Tongue Twister

This is our newest child, Aaron. He was 1 year in December. One might wonder why I am posting pictures of him sticking out his tongue. It is because he is tongue-tied. His frenulum is so tethered that it could not be snipped, at least not until he is older. He has never stuck his tongue out, even as an infant. The good news is that he can talk well for his age.

This picture was taken this morning. As you can see, he doesn't get his tongue past his lips, and the second picture shows the heart shape, formed from the tethering.

We are proud that he is trying to get that little tongue out. Maybe he can loosen his frenulum some. Good job, Aaron!